Friday, July 21, 2006
Now, I think I was foolish. When absence is not missed, it can hardly be reciprocated.
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Xiu Juan out
@ |8:55 PM|
Different, yet the same
6 months ago I thought it would be easy to leave. Then, in May, I started to panic. During June I dreaded in various moments. By July I despaired. I thought leaving the life I've known was very difficult.
Now, I think I was foolish. When absence is not missed, it can hardly be reciprocated.
But I can't say I anticipate each day either. I don't enjoy waking up becuase of the cold. I am wary of bathing due to unexpected, unpleasant fluctuations in the water temperature. I don't look forward to shopping in the nearest civilised suburb as it meant spending money on mere basic husehold neccessities. Huge supermarkets, which were initially a source of excitement for me, have morphed into sensory-overloaded experiences as I struggle to decide n every biscuit, candy or canned tuna I buy.
I guess my life is meant to be like this. Not monochrome, just a little off-colour.
Xiu Juan out
@ |8:55 PM|